It means disease getting worse, not progress at all!

I'm sad to report that the little tumours in my lymph system have been growing again. A recent scan confirmed what I've been noticing, lumps and sometimes some aching. No new sites, so that's good, but at least 3 “masses” in my abdomen.

I'm in for more chemo, starting soon at the Mater in Brisbane – my 3rd time. Using the same drugs over and over can lead to cancer resistence, so this time I'll have carboplatin and gemcitabine (last time was carbo plus paclitaxol). Previously I have been the model patient and very responsive to these platinum drugs, so hopefully this continues. There is a ghastly list of possible side effects ahead, but again I'm hoping to cope well as I have before.

By now we reckon tamoxifen wasn't helping me, so I've stopped taking it. I will be really happy if this means fewer hot flushes. It has been a long hot and sweaty summer for me!

I'm awash with many different feelings:

  • Disappointed and weepy about being a patient again

  • Glad I've made the most of my time free from treatment

  • Heartache about being a cause for grief and worry for my dear ones

  • Fairly relaxed as an “old hand” at chemo, and confident of success

  • Grateful for a dedicated medical team I can trust, and relieved I have treatment options

  • Very appreciative of the great caring and support from my family and friends

xxx Alison

12 thoughts on “Progression”

  1. HI Alison. So sorry to hear about this new setback. It was good to see you home again and well for a good while, and I hope to see you back there again very soon. It's a tough journey this chemo, isn't it? Best of luck with the new drugs. My thoughts and prayers will be with you.

  2. Our thoughts and lots of love Alison. Binzi PS – Your a very good communicator and an inspiration as always!

  3. Stay positive,stay safe, you have done it before & can do it again. We love you, love may not help cure cancer but we are giving it a try anyway.

  4. Alison You are an inspiration to all of us as cancer is never far away from any of us .But your strength and positive attitude overwhelm me.I pray for this treatment to be the one for you ,Good health and love Jill xx

  5. Dearest Alison, sorry to here about the latest news…but so amazed by your strength and positive way of dealing with it all. We send our love and thoughts and i hope we can catch up some time this year xox Jane and Anders and crew.

  6. Ali, I'm not sure if my message got through but I'm thinking of you and with you all the way through the treatment. Remember last September and the pleasure we had during your visit -stay strong and believe. With love your sort of English cousin

  7. Hi Alison, I'm so sorry about the bad news and that you have to go through the chemo again. It's great that you have been able to do so much recently including your trip overseas. We love you and are thinking of you.

  8. Alison – very sorry to see your news. My thoughts continue to be with you and I'm sure if anyone can successfully send those annoying tumours packing it will be you. Good luck with your treatment – my fingers will be crossed. Best wishes. xx

  9. Bugger bugger bugger Alison. Thank goodness you are now in Brisbane so the split life between Yunngaburra and the chemo ward is gone. You really are quite amazing in your clarity and candidness. The whole story that you have been diligently documenting has been a big investment in keeping everyone aware of how this sneaky women's business cancer impacts a life.You have been quite remarkable though as you have tackled each round with such fierceness. It is soooo hard though – that dark shadow lurking….(for other readers wondering – I am also a Ovarian Ca survivor and remain well after four years). I was wanting to see you again soon and hope that can happen – perhaps I can sit with you during a round at the Mater. Let me know if that is suitable. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  10. Hi Alison so sorry you are back for chemo! warmest regards and best of luck with this round of treatment. love Jodie Eden

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