More delay

Still no chemo because my neutrophils are too low for the 3rd week running. Slowly my white blood cells are recovering, but not sufficiently yet to be ready for another knock down. I had the trial drug on its own again today.

I’m disappointed, but the doctors were very reassuring. They told me the IV chemo for ovarian cancer is very strong – the highest dose given for any cancer, except maybe one other where only a single treatment is involved. Hopefully I’ll be ok to go ahead with chemo next week and my oncologist proposes to reduce the dose a little so my bone marrow can cope with replenishing my neutrophils afterwards.

nov2011Today in the oncology ward Janet and I did art therapy together, a conversation in colour. We used water-soluble oil pastels together on the same page. We were invited to explore opposites, so we took turns to be the one who expressed light or heavy emotions (happiness vs misery). It was an interesting process and I loved sharing this with my dear sister. It felt good to put colour to the feelings, but I noticed how unbalanced it felt to focus on either extreme. I found the session helpful in some way, and maybe it was about experiencing small shift (in myself) towards greater acceptance of painful emotions and problems. I was a bit surprised by the resulting picture – not particularly beautiful overall, but with many gorgeous and exciting parts. I have zoomed in on a couple of sections to show you.

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